A Path of Healing Through Christ
By Lisa Ni Conchuir, DLP Student, Melbourne, Australia
The following words are of my personal journey of healing through Christ, particularly through The Christian Community. My words are in no way prescriptive or an answer to ‘how to heal through Christ’ but a story of discovery of ‘Life’ that is ongoing.
For around 20 years of my adult life I lived with a deep experience of depression that evolved into chronic fatigue. I struggled to comprehend any purpose to my life and to comprehend how others experienced purpose in their lives. A standout thought during this time was one of ‘worthlessness’. This sharing, however, is about the journey of emerging from this inner landscape of darkness.
Goodness, where to begin and what to choose? I’ll begin with a book that a new friend at the time, when I was 28, suggested that I read. She had been talking to me of The Christian Community and how highly she considered Rev. Lisa Devine as I had turned away from Christianity many years before. The book was The Childhood of Jesus by Emil Bock. This was my first foray into reading either a Christian Community or Anthroposophical book. As I read this book my heart began to vibrate and I had an inner knowing that this description of the two Jesus children was true. From there I developed my relationship with The Christian Community in Melbourne, Australia.
In time I engaged with counselling with Rev. Lisa Devine and after many years of difficulty with counsellors I felt ‘understood’. I began to learn that what I was going through could be explored on various levels of physical, soul and spirit. The spiritual/soul understanding was like receiving an important piece of a puzzle that helped everything else find its place. Life began to make sense.
Skipping ahead quite a few years now, I would attend the Sunday talks offered by our priest Rev. Lisa Devine and later Rev. Cheryl Nekvapil, though I did not attend the Act of Consecration of the Human Being. For many years I attended these talks and there came a time when I began to take one aspect or teaching of what I had heard and apply it to my life. I could see areas of my personality reflected in the stories and character traits that were of my lower self. There were suggested exercises or contemplations which I would do and through this I was able to change and lift my thinking to observation rather than ‘poor me’ and ‘judgement’ of myself and others. This was over a period of time but slowly, slowly I was changing. My depression continued to lift, I was able to be more observant of my feelings, thoughts and actions and move from a habitual response to a considered response … sometimes :). The talks of the teachings of Christ and his life, combined with discussion and sharing from those attending enabled an unfolding of my inner being and a stepping closer to the healing power of Christ. There was a ‘truth’ experienced in these occasions that called me and somehow helped me to evolve.
Angel in the Sun by J. M. W. Turner reflects to me how Christ and the angelic beings are ever present in the life of every human being waiting to be invited to enter.
After many years of attending the church, quietly and keeping myself on the outer, I chose to attend the Act of Consecration of the Human Being. I had attended only a few times before and was not moved by the experience, though I loved and received much benefit from taking my daughter to the Children’s Services. I chose to attend the Act of Consecration again as I had looked at the congregants as they were coming out of the chapel and recognised that they ‘had a glow’. Something was happening in there that I didn’t understand and I wished to understand it … and the glow looked good too! I attended and engaged by focussing on the words of the priest as much as possible, visualising ‘light’ crosses in my inner body as I performed the physical crosses and lo and behold I walked out a different person. I felt what I would call a spark of light inside me that had been waiting to be lit, had now been lit. I experienced something of the life of Christ, though I didn’t know what it was or understand how the change happened, it happened. Soon afterwards I attended a Christian Community retreat where during a nature observation exercise I had a momentary experience of Christ and God as the Ground of the World. For two months after this I had no depression, which was amazing, as I had not been able to make it through a week without at least one day of depression for many years. I didn’t just “not” have depression but I would say I ‘glowed’. I had no fear of people, no feelings of worthlessness, only of joy, friendliness, greater capability and greater physical energy. In the 3rd month the ‘glow’ waned and depression slowly returned; however, it never returned in the same way. I had experienced a truth and clarity in myself that I knew existed even when I was experiencing depression. In that time I felt and knew that Christ was with me always, and I had found the purpose and meaning in life - to strive to know and be with Christ.
Now in my early 50’s as I become older I become healthier - physically, emotionally and spiritually. I certainly did not imagine this in my younger days and, more so, I feel younger in my being. In the past year I have had a great blessing in being able to participate in the Distance Learning Program with the NA Seminary. Again my relationship with Christ has deepened further, and I see the wonderful, never ending journey of exploration of the Way, the Truth and the Life through Him. Though I know in this moment that Christ is always in my life and I can participate in his Life, there are still moments when I do lose sight of Christ. Through the course we have learnt how to find Christ through prayer, through the Gospels, through the festivals of the year, through discussion and sharing with fellow seekers and through the Sacraments. Now, if I lose sight of Christ I have many tools at hand ‘to seek him’. Every experience has been a blessing and all permeated through the love of Christ through the priests, members and friends I have met and journeyed with through life and The Christian Community. And I recognize the love offered to me and strive, and fail, and strive again to offer it in return.
… I am writing this piece during Easter and this Easter Sunday 2024 during the Act of Consecration of the Human Being I experienced for the first time the renewal of the life of Christ in the world and in myself. It was like an etheric light turned on in the chapel. The air was brighter, I was brighter inside myself coupled with an experience of joy, gratitude and love for the other. It was wondrous: ‘Christ really was renewed in the year’ and so was I, so were We. A life was stirred inside myself that was me yet more than myself at the same time. My life that was darkened for so many years continues to become lighter and brighter as I journey to seek Christ. There are certainly still challenges. I am still enrolled in ‘Life Learning 101’ … and He is with me, and I with Him as the healing journey to become human continues.
Our Author:
Lisa is a member of The Christian Community congregation in Melbourne, Australia. She works as a Shiatsu and Japanese therapies practitioner and has interests in Biodynamics, wood carving and a new love of Latin. After participating in a ‘Presentation Only’ program with the NA Seminary Lisa took up learning Latin at University. Lisa is a very grateful participant this year in the Distance Learning Program led by Rev. Patrick Kennedy.